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Hey Fiso.. I am so sorry to hear about all your ups and downs right now.. I hope you get some positive news from your doc next week.. keep us posted.. I'll be interested to hear what is going on.

And your body is going through so much right now.. it is no wonder you are crying and nauseaus!!!

I also have a doc appointment next week.. Monday to be exact... I am very anxious as I had my nuchal translucency u/s last week and I assume I will hear the results on Monday... I also had a bit of a scare yesterday.. I woke up and was spotting.... which I have done before... but very mildly.. this seemed a bit more and I was so freaked out... I still am even though today there has thankfully been nothing.

I called my doc right away yesterday and he said (by this time the spotting had stopped).. so he said.. not to worry.. take it easy.. but if anything starts again to come in right away. So Luckily that was all.. But it is so worrisome.. there is always something to worry about.

So I've been able to take it easy yesterday and today... but tomorrow I am a bit worried.. my aunt recently passed away froma nasty bout of cancer.. so her funeral is tomorrow and it is going to be quite emotionally draining.. and then DH and I are supposed to go to his office christmas party tomorrow night.. I am worried it might be too much in one day (there is alot of driving involved tomorow as well)... so all I am going to do is listen to my body.. and if I don't go to the christmas party.. no biggie.. I'll just stay home with a bowl of popcorn and a movie!!

Anyway.. have a great weekend and let me know what your doc says next week!

Hey baby4us, oh boy, what a day tomorrow...! As I can see, nobody is out of the woods. Even when you are pregnant, somehting can always happen. Glad that you are not pushing yourself too much. A good movie and some popcorn are always our friends!
Hang in there until Monday and don't let your imagination and your fear take over. I'll let you know what happens with us.

baby4us, thanks for asking about me (and fiso). I guess I'm doing okay. I'm thinking about trying another IVF in February/March. The RE is of course pushing donor egg. It's really hard to think about that. Given how important "blood" is to the Japanese, I'd feel like I was lying to my relatives if I had a child by donor egg and "passed it off" as my own genetic offspring. I am very uncomfortable with lies. But one of the best things I have to offer a child is the Japanese side of my family, so I'd feel compelled not to say anything about the child's origin.

Well, I guess I shouldn't get ahead of myself. I can probably try one more IVF with my own eggs first, and still come up with enough money to try with a donor egg. The thought of spending so much money to have a child that is not genetically related to me when just three years ago I could have had "for free" a child that was genetically mine and my husband's just kills me. It all seems like some bad dream. Three years ago everyone--the counselor at Planned Parenthood, my primary care physician, and my friends--said I'd have no problem getting pregnant in my early 40s (given my track record for pregnancy).

I hope your pregnancy is continuing well, and that you can relax a bit now that you're through the first trimester.

baby4us, I'm so sorry that my previous post wasn't exactly responsive to the other posts--I didn't realize that I had to click to get to the next page's worth of posts, so I was responding to your "reply #14".

I'm so sorry to hear of your scares. I hope your potentially very busy Saturday (12/3) went well. And please let us know about your visit to the doctor on Monday (12/5). I so hope that everything is okay and that your second trimester goes as smoothly as your first from here on out.

fiso, Thanks to you too for asking about me. Like you, I cry "for no reason". I mean I know why I cry, but it seems to hit me a bit randomly. Friday was awful. I saw the RE, who basically said that I should really be thinking about donor eggs. I know that that's about where we are medically, and I guess REs are worried about their patients' being under false impressions about just what the wonders of medical technology can and cannot do, but the harsh delivery of facts that I well know by now was very unpleasant.

Teri-chan, I consider all the details of our situatiosn to be private and I share my dealings with infertility to only my closest friends and some of my relatives. Would it be an option for you to not say anything about the egg donor-if you choose that road- to your family? It's only a matter between your husband and you.
And don't dwell on the past, there is nothing you can change about it. Don't let it eat your up.The only thing you can do is focus on now, today.

baby4us, I hope everything went fine....

fiso, you're right it should all be private. I think I could just not say anything. It turns out though that it will be very hard and/or very expensive to find a Japanese egg donor. Since my husband, who is Caucasian, is willing to go with a sperm donor, I also checked into Japanese sperm (to use with a Caucasian egg), but I found only one person, and I'm not sure I like the rest of the profile. It's hard enough to think of using an egg donor, but now I have to find out that that may not be a live option either?! Thanks for your support, fiso. It's much appreciated.

Hi Guys so far so good....

Teri-chan.. just stay positive for your next IVF in Feb/March... and as hard as it is.. please don't beat yoruself up for any decisions from the past... you can't loo into teh future.. and you had to make deciisons based on what was best for you at teh time... so let's hope that Feb/March is yoru time! Baby dust!

Fiso.. how are you doing?

Hi there. Thanks for asking baby4us. I'm doing OK. Going to the see the doc tomorrow to see what's the next step. I'm also waiting for my first periods after the m/c. so far, nothing...
Are you OK?

Hey Fiso.. so far so good.. was at the doc last Monday... he said everything is fine..and did an u/s to ease my mind.. saw the heartbeat and the baby zooming around. So I guess I am just going to have to live with the fact that I may spot and have cramps... as nerve wracking as that is...

Anyway.. I've been able to take it fairly easy the last little while and I think it has helped a lot. We did have a busy weekend with Christmas parties and stuff.. but I was able to bow out of a couple of obligations and sent DH on his own.. and I think that was wise.. I was just getting too tired.

I have also started to increase my exercise routine... which is making me feel so much better... the snow is on the ground and I have been out cross country skiing every day. I had stopped exercising other than lots of long walks with the dogs.. once I found out I was pregnant.. I was too worried about jeopardizing anything.. so hopefully now starting in my 2nd trimester... I can get some more activity in my day.. it just makes me feel so much better.. and I don't feel as guilty about all the food I am eating.

Let me know about your doctor's appintment tomorrow.> i am interested to hear wheat s/he says!

baby4us: I'm really glad to hear that all is well with your pregnancy! It must be so nice to get out and get some exercise after being relatively sedentary for a while. I've found it very frustrating to have to stop exercising when undergoing fertility treatments. The treatments are so rough on the emotions, and exercise would help so much!

fiso: I hope that things go well with your doctor's appointment tomorrow. You mentioned that you still haven't had a period after your miscarriage and that you've been nauseated. Do you think maybe you're pregnant?

Teri-chan.. I know how emotionally drainign those fertility treatments are.. I think I gained 10 pounds during treatment (from the drugs and stress, etc)... but walking has helped me so much... and I am just gald I am now abelk to add some more challenging things to my routine.

Fiso.. I am interested to hear what happened at your doc appointment......

Hi. Well, nothing really new, except that we are going to start a new IVF cycle this month, when I get my period next week. (no, I'm not pregnant, I did a blood test and I'm just late). I decided that I didn't want to wait for January. The reason why I felt nauseous was that my hormones levels were getting back to normal, after being pregnant.
This time, the doc suggested to add acupuncture. Have you done that? Just the thought of being poked by more needles..... but I think I will give it a try.
My doc recommended also to walk during the treatment. It's a least some kind of exercise.

Great news that you can do an IVF cycle this month.. I'll be thinking of you. Keep us informed... you know.. when your period comes.. when you start your needles... retrieval, etc etc.

Good Luck.... would sure be a nice Christmas present for you !!!

Thanks Baby4us. I feel ready to attack this beast! I will keep you posted of all the steps, hopefully, I won't be complaining too much!

Hey teri-chan, how are you doing?

I'm visiting my father for Christmas, and my internet access is limited. I'm doing reasonably well. It's nice to be here where I feel safe and secure like I did when I was a kid--long before I ever thought of fertility problems!

I started acupuncture about a month before my egg retrieval. I didn't get a pregnancy that stuck, of course, but I do find it relaxing.

I'll probably be out of touch until the new year.

I hope both of you--fiso and baby4us--have good holidays!