Just Starting
9 Replies
Risa - April 23

Hi, my dH and I are just about to begin the IVF treatment in a few days after trying to conceive for the past 3 years, and I am very nervous and scared of what is to come. My mother passed away almost a year ago and I feel I have no one to talk to about the way I feel. When I was upset yesterday about what lies ahead, about the fact that this is happening to us, my husband didn't know what to say to me. So many people have it so easy and being only 27, I thought for sure this can't be happening.
My RE is 2 hours away and we have to do a lot of traveling for the treatments and visits. And to be honest, I really can't put into words the way that I feel. I read someone else's post that dH only wants to fix things and does not really know how to just listen and be supportive. My husband is wonderful but I think I will really need all of your support since you have an idea of what I am going through.
If anyone has any encouraging words or advice on what is to come, please share. Thanks!


Tiffany F. - April 23

Welcome Risa,

We are here for you always, I totally understand what you are saying about your Dh, mine is wonderful as well but I just CANNOT talk to him about certain things, this site is truly a blessing I thank God for it!

You will find women that are going through exactly what you are going or have been through what lies ahead for you.

You can feel free to talk about anything, if you need to vent, or just support we are here for you welcome.

Have you ever been pregnant before? Just pray and believe that everything works out, God is so good!

Keep us updated, Take Care....Tiffany


Asunflower - April 23

Hang in there! I am addicted to this site! It gets me through each and everyday along with prayer. Everything works out to God's plan. I am 31 and don't know why I have to go through this either but it is already my 2nd round of trying and I am still going strong because of this site as well as my faith! We are always here for you!


Risa - April 23

Thank you ladies, so much. I feel the support and courage already. Tiffany, no I have never been pregnant before. My husband has very, very low sperm count and motility.
I find it strange that they did several tests on him, but not one test on me. Is this normal?
Also financially, where does everyone get this kind of money. Do most people use credit cards? Or is there some type of loan we can take out? We have several thousand saved but not enought to cover the $12,000 amount necessary.
And thanks, I feel better already that I can always come online to find support when I am feeling sad, confused, frustrated or happy.


fiso - May 2

Risa, don't hesitate to come to thsi site. There is always someone with the right words to help you. This site really saved me from dispair when I had a m/c. I didn't know what to do with myself. The treatments are hard, physically and emotionally, everyone will tell you that. It's an emotional rollercoaster, that's when this site and all its wonderful ladies come in to help you.

Ask as many questions as possible to your doctors, the nurses. The more you understand and know, the more 'under-controlled' you feel (even if, in the end, it's up to nature to make it work!).

Talking to women who are going through what you are is the key. Men dont' see things the same way and they can not relate because their bodies work diffently!! Even you girlriends with whom you share everything may not be able to help you in understanding what's going on. Only people who have been in shoes will be able to give you the right advice.

Let us know when you all the steps of your treatment. We'll be here all the way with you.

Baby dust to you.


Risa - May 2

I just began the birth control pills yesterday and set my appointment for the nurse IVF consult and sono with hsg for May10th. All of this still sounds like chinese to me, but I guess with time, I will understand it more. I am glad that I am a teacher and have the summer off beginning May 30th to have all of these appointments and no one questioning me on why I would need to take so many days off. I actually really nervous about the Luprol injections and if I will be able to administer them myself. Let me know if anyone has any advice or comforting words.



baby4us - May 3

Welcome to the site Risa. trust me... you'll need it.. only because it is such a great site with great resources and the most amazing ladies to come to for support.

I know exaclty how you feel.. I joined these boards a little over a year ago and did not have a clue what to expect or what was going on.

Thank goodness for this site.. I come here every day for support and advice.

Ask any question.. you will have many... the first round is always the most difficult just because you don't really know what to expect... and you might just need the one IVF.. so Baby dust to you!

But you will learn.. just remember to educate yourself as much as you can. Ask your doc and RE tons of questions... and treat yourself as much as you can! (even if it is just a nap.. or a nice lunch.. trust me.. it helps!)

I too had to drive about 1.5 hours for treatment.. I remember all last summer.. how many times I was on the road by 5:30am... it was so dark and lonely... but I got through.. and so will you.. Good Luck!


Risa - May 5

Congratulations, wonderful that you are due in just a few months! Do you know if there are any success stories where a couple will just have one round of treatment and it works the first time? I really hope and pray that it works the first time....



fiso - May 5

Don't worry about the Lupron shots. For me, they were my 'favorite" if I may say so! The needle is thin, and it's not that painful. But at the end of the treatment, my belly was black and blue, and DH didn't know where to poke any more! But all together, it wasn't that bad. Can you ask your DH to give you the shots? I found it easier, not to have to worry about the injection site, the dosage, etc, I would just have my belly ready! And it's also a way for you two to share this experience. That's his litltle contribution.
Ask as many questions as needed. The nurses at the center where I went were soooo nice, always available for even silly questions. They know, they understand. So don't hesitate. That will give you a little control over things.
One really good thing for you is that you will be off from work. Less stress, no need to justify, explain yourself. And if you are not feeling good, you can take a nap!

Hang in there and dont' lose hope. We'll be here to help you.

Baby dust to you.


Julie - Hoping - May 8

Hi Risa
I'd love to have a cycle buddy, I just posted in the ART work forum. My husband and I are taking the big leap into IVF too. I'm on birth control pills and will start Lupron on May 19th so you're a few days ahead of me. This pre-cycle is moving so slowly. We had our consultation with our RE today, thankfully it's only an hour away, I barely made it through my second question before crying but I'm sure I'm not the first or last to do that in his office.

My sister-in-law is 38 (never had trouble conceiving) and due in a week, my sister just called last week to tell me she's due in December. I never would wish either a moment of this but their timing was just so hard on me. Lots of prayers and pounds of baby dust. We'll get through this!



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