IVF anyone?
2699 Replies
lyly14 - February 10

Hi Julie- I do not plan on giving up just yet. I have actually been pregnant 4 times all concieved naturally with no help, so I knew this time didn't work. I didn't feel anything and I always knew a week and a half after I concieved. We have 3 embryos left so that cuts down on cost for the next try. I am hoping that works and we wont need to do another fresh , but if it doesn't then I will definitely do it again. Really not sure what the problem is, but maybe in the meantime I will ask for more testing. Any relief with your m/s yet?


Jules614 - February 11

No relief. I am miserable and sometimes want to be shot... but, I am just blessed to be pregnant. You will get your chance too. You have a great attitude and positive thinking is half the battle.



Arabsrcool - February 11


I am so sorry to hear about you bfn. I have been following your posts and was very hopeful that you would get good news. I hope AF comes quickly and your center gets moved so you can keep moving forward.

I am starting stims on Weds and this will also be my first IVF. It really brought it home that this could also not work for me either....everything looked good for you....it makes no sense why it did not take.

Best of Luck and baby dust for you.


lyly14 - February 11

Arabsrcool- Thanks for your kind words. I am disappointed that this didn't work this time, but realistically I was well aware that there is still a big chance it wouldn't work on the first try. I was hoping we would have more frozen embryos to work with to save some money on future IVF since the ICSI is out of pocket for us. For now I pray those last 3 embryos will be my miracle but if not I am not giving up that easily. I am not ready to throw in the towel just yet. Be hopeful but realistic. It is the only way to keep yourself from going nuts during this whole journey. Good luck to you on your first IVF. If you ever have any questions or just feel like chatting I am here for you.


Jules614 - March 4

Hey Lyly -

How are you holding up these days?



Marina - March 4

We 've been on "2ww".
I just lost my baby boy at 16 weeks.Went for rutine appoitment,doctor didn't hear the heartbeat,sent us for u/s and it confirmed.They sent us to the hospital,induced me and in 24 hours I had my baby.After that I start bleeding and they couldn't stop it,took me for [email protected]'ve lost about 2.5 litters of blood,they did a blood transfusion for 2 days,then I got a fever 105,so it's been a week I'm out of hospital,trying to recover physically,still very weak and dizzy,I'm not even mention emotional part.Yesterday we went for the follow up appt.,all my tests(million of them) came back(exept genetics and chromosome for the baby) normal,they found NOTHING that could be wrong with me.I'm just in shock,we thoght after 12 weeks we are safe.
How is your pregnancy going?


Jules614 - March 5

Oh My god Marina! I am in tears reading your post! I am sooooo sorry!!!! I am sure words don't even explain the emotional rollercoaster you have been through *hugs*. Did you have any signs this could have happened? I have my 16 week appointment next week and I have had some pressure in my uterus and have been worried..

ISo, you are on your 2WW. How many embryo's did you put back? Were they frozen. I had no idea this was going on? When did it happen?

My pregnancy is OK. I am still throwing up. I have been sick with a sinus infection.



Marina - March 5

No julie,I just ment that we post on "2ww",because that is where everybody hangs out-I wish I was on 2ww! No,it happened Feb 23 and I was in the hospital untill last tuesday and I had NO signs at all.I even felt baby kiking for the first time few days before it's happened,and they said he was exactly 15weeks and 2 days,so he died just a few days before my check up.That moment when she didn't hear the heartbeat was the worst moment in my life,I almost fainted.I didn't mean to to scary you,you 'll be fine!I just haven't see you posting lately.If everything heals ok,I'l lprobably will be doing FET with Lyly in April.
I cried my eyes over this last week and even after what happened I think I'm more than ever want this baby,so I'll be doing FET some time in April.
Let me know how your check up went.


Jules614 - March 5

Marina -

My check up isn't for another week. My heart still drops when reading your story because I understand how much you went through to have this baby. Are you seeking counseling? You seem to be a very strong person talking about it to me. I think I would be afraid to even log on to any chat as I would have a nervous breakdown. What happened to you, is it common? How is your hubby holding up? I am glad you have frozen embryo's - I didn't have any. How many do you have?



Marina - March 5

julie,it's a strange thing- i can talk to you guys,but only now I exept phone calls from my clouse friends and family,my DH was keeping everybody away from me because I asked him to,I just could't talk to anybody without crying and didn't want to.No,I'm not getting any conseling-I'm a strong person and I'm not going to be depressed and let my DH to be depressed,the best way to get over what happened-just have hope that I will do it again soon and don't just give up.We have 6 frozen beauties,so it's just the matter of time,when I recover and can start all over again.There is some things that doctors told me,but for your piece of mind I'm not going to tell you,just dont' try on every bad situation that happens to other people,It's not good for you.You and your baby doing just fine and it'll stay this way!


Jules614 - March 5

marina -

you are so incredibly strong! i praise you in every way! thank you for feeling as though you can talk to me. That is great that you have 6 mbryo's left! How many do you think you will put back in? Are you open to the idea of twins? Just know, I am here if you ever want to tak.
I also have myspace if you want to chat outside here.



Marina - March 6

Julie,I have no choice-I have to be this way,otherwise you get depressed and what good does it do?Spend your life feeling sorry for yourself?I have another child to worry about also and I don't want him to see me depressed.And what other people don't know-how much money we've spent and what I had to go through-we didn't even tell family(exept my dad and a few very close friends of mine) and now what?I can't be left with an empty hands,I can't stop now, when i know that I have 6 more babies there,especialy after doctors tell me there is absolutely nothing wrong with me and it's just a bad luck this time and I can do it again in 2 months.
You know, I wasn't open to an idea of twins(that's why we put only one in a first place).but now i know they will tell me put more then one and I'll probably will do that to increase my chances.I don't know if I can carry more than one(I'm very pettite-5'2 and 107 lb) and concider the risks...I dont' know ,will see what my RE has to say.
we freezed them in couples 2-2-2,so basicly we have 3 trys,but will see if they survived(hopefuly at least one or two will)
And you know what's funny,my DH says that even if we get PG with twins we can give one for adoption(yea,right)if I don't want to deal with two,there is plenty people who would pay a big money to have this child.The ??? is can you realy give your child away?This is all a joke,he just trying to make me feel better about the possibility.And if serious,he is very very sad.He was sooo exited and happy and it seemed like if he could ,he would carry that baby himself....
I'd be happy to chat with you on your page on myspace and get to know you better,I've never done this before.


Jules614 - March 6

Hey Marina - I completely understand what you mean about not feeling sorry for yourself. I cried many nights and was extremely depressed for over a year and a half because I could not get pregnant. All my friends were pregnant without even trying - some not even married! I felt so defeated - and the IVF was the heardest thing I ever did emotionally because I couldn't phathom the thought of it not working.. I feel like my infertility destroyed me in some ways - my friends told me a part of me died... I am afraid, that I am weak and if something happened with this pregnancy I wouldn't be strong enough... Pretty pathetic.

My husband was petrified of us having twins (my sister is currently pregnant with twins from IUI's) and he told me he would not want two babies if I got pregnant with twins - scary thing is, I think he meant it... I could NEVER get rid of a child growing inside of me - even if it was triplets. I would do what I could to survive.

My myspace page is myspace.com/julielinda813



Marina - March 6

Julie,I love my friends,but they are different from us,they just don't understand(and never will) what we have to deal with,because what happened to them naturaly,we have to fight for this.And I never join the discussion when someone start telling things like"God knows what he is doing and if he doesn't want you to have kids(or more kids)than it meant to be"Well,really?What about people,who never wanted kids or kill babies -why God allow them to have kids?And listen to my friends ,when they share how they raise their kids-and think to myself-gosh,i'd never leave my baby cry for hour only to train him not to be spoiled...But it's them,we are in a different boat.And julie,you can't live your life and be afraid every day that something bad might happen.If you do,you will end up in a nut house.
The way my husband looks at things(and I)-we are happy with each other and have my son,and we did this not because we are missing something,we just wanted to add more joy in our lifes.Well,the day it hapeened I wished we never did and left our life exactly the way it was before,but now everything changed over this few months and bacame real.I can't help myself sometimes and torture by thinking maybe this happened because I didn't want it so bad and had my doubts before we started this process?and i wanted a girl but it was a boy?Well,it's too late now anyway,and now I know that I want it more than ever and I don't even care now if it's a girl or a boy.
Julie,thanks for letting me vent!


Jules614 - March 6

Marina - It's OK to vent - and trust me, if you didn't really want a child, you would have never agreed to do IVF. I completely understand what you mean about wanting it so bad and not caring if it is a boy or a girl. This time around, all I want is a healthy baby. Telll me abou your other child - how old is your son? Did you have trouble conceiving him? I had trouble conceiving my daughter but it never went to IVF. HUbby had a vericose vein and he had it lazored. Once it was lazored I got pregnant quickly - but I only had wished we figured out the problem right away and not almost 3 yrs later! I thought it would be so easy to get pregnant the second time and it was all that much harder.. I tried clomid for 3 months, ended up with bad Cysts, then I did 3 IUI's that all failed, then my last resort was IVF. If I had to do it again, I would try IVF and skip everything else because iVF is so successful. You will be pregnant again before you know it. I truly agree with you that things don't happen for a reason - I see too many crack whores having one child after another and keeping them so their parents can raise them while they do lines and walk the streets - very bitter subject for me...

Ok I have vented too - lets call us even!



lyly14 - March 6

Hi girls sorry it has been a while since I have posted. I have been busy at work and not much is going on with me. Just waiting!!!!!!!!

Julie- I am glad to see you are doing well. I wish you all the best at your next appointment. I am sure everything will be fine.

Marina- How are you feeling? I know it is such a terrible thing to deal with. You have every right to vent. What harm does it do? and all of us on here understand the struggle. It is funny how it is so easy to talk to all of you about what is going on, but I hate talking to even my close friends about it. I don't having an easy time discussing my personal life as it is, but I feel like everyone on here understands somewhat. I remember when I lost my last pregnancy, a good friend said to me "well at least you already have one child". This coming from a psychologist! I could not believe how insensitive people could be. So if you don't want to discuss it with people then don't.

Any idea about your FET? I spoke with one of the RE's in my practice( not my usual guy since he is away at a conference) and he told me they still don't have official dates when the embryology lab will be up and running. He said either the 2nd or 3rd week in April. Dh and I are anxious to get started, so I may have to go back on bcp to manipulate my cycle to coincide with the lab. I really don't want to wait for my April period to come to get started since the FET is scheduled about 2 weeks after. That would put the actual transfer at the end of April beginning of May! So at least with the bcp I can just stop taking it and get my period and get started. It would be nice if we can both go through it together and get a bfp.



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