just starting IVF & need guidance
6 Replies
Lila - July 11

I am very new to this and have been reading all your posts for hours. They are so informative and helpful (also a little scary to realize all that these IVF treatments will involve).

I am 38 and DH is 43. We have been married for 8 years and ttc for last year and half. Before that DH kept saying he wanted a family but was not ready yet. I thought if I let him have time and space he would come around - I never thought we would lose so much precious time. I so regret I did not fight harder for what I knew was right which was not to wait till it was too late which is what I fear we have done. I have never been pregnant, last 6 cycles were with clomide and last 3 cycles were also with IUI but none of that did the trick.

I have a couple questions concerning the clomide if anyone can help me out I would really appreciate it. At my first RE appointment yesterday he did a sonagram and realized I had developed two large cysts, he belives from the clomide. He hopes they will go away on their own but after reading the posts here it sounds like most women need to take birth control pills to aid this along. Is that accurate? How long do they tend to take till they go away? Any more info on cysts from clomide would be great.

One other question I have is does anyone have any suggestions about how to best educate yourself about all these drugs. I tend to be very trusting of doctors and take their reccomendations without question, but it seems that to survive infertility you must become extremely proactive. What do you all do? If RE suggest drug or proceedure protocol do you do what they say or do you question? Do you risk offending these experts if you do question? I hate confrontation so I tend to be very accomodating to authority figures, but I am worried that I can not be so trusting since I am already working against a very tight clock.

Sorry I have gone on for so long - I really look forward to joing all your discussions and learning how to navigate these difficult waters. Thanks.


fiso - July 12

Hi Lila. First of all, welcome to the site! As you may have seen already, everyone is soooooo supportive, it really helps.

Regarding your questions: I also had cysts because of the chlomid. (I hated this drug!). But after time , they disappeared. My Doc told me that that was one consequence of taking Chlomid. I'm not sure if the birth control helps in this case. I thought we took birth control to regulate the cycle every time you start a new round of treatment. That would be a question for your doc.

While I was doing the treatments, I started reading all the info provided with each drug and I got scared! All the side effects and also the different cases when the drugs are used.... it was scary. I decided not to read it any more and trust my doc. But at the same time I did some research on the Internet. It's better to be informed, a little!
One thing you can do is ask plenty of questions to your doc before you star a new cycle. In my case, I need to understand in order to accept things.... After all, it's your body and you are still free to decide what you want to do with it!!

Hang in there. We are supporting ecah other in good times and bad times. It's good to know other women who are going through the same things we are.

Baby dust to you and keep us posted.



Lila - July 12

Congratulations on your upcoming due date I am sure you are very excited and hope your pregnancy has been a great experience.

Thanks for the reply and welcome as you said the great thing about this site does seem to be all the support. My DH tries very hard but I really think he is just incapable of seeing how mentally consuming and draining this issue can be so it has been a relief to find a place to connect with others and not feel too alone.

Thanks for advice on cysts. If you do not mind me asking how long did it take for yours to go away? You mentioned you disliked Clomide - any other issues I should know about? My doctor mentioned cysts but I was under the impression that the risk was more like the risk of ovarian cancer that it was something that was more linked to really extended use not just 6 months. Oh well live and learn.

Again thanks for taking the time to reply I really appreciate it.


rapinh - July 12

Hi Lila!
You have very good questions and should totally feel at home asking away on this site! I have found I feel the most comforted and learn the most by reading what others have been through via this site.

I did Clomid for three months at the beginning of my treatment (I am onto IVF now). The clomid did not help me because the drug affected my uterine lining, preventing it from being thick enough to support a pregnancy. I know it doesn't do this to everyone, but it did to me beginning the second round I used it.

My RE then put me onto injectible med's (Follistim) to encourage ovulation--that gave me cysts. For each month I did injectibles I spent the following month with no treatment--that was how long it took my cysts to disappear; I was never on birth control, the cysts just needed a non-drug cycle to absorb. I did that 4 separate times, twice before laproscopy for endo, and twice after. The fourth round of injectibles resulted in a BFP, but I mc at 8wks (knew around 6wks something was wrong due to low hcg and u/s--still sad, though). After that drama, my DH and I decided to just go for IVF--enough was enough in our case.

So, there's my story! Sorry it took awhile to tell, but it seems relevent in respect to your history. My advice is to ask your RE about your uterine lining and if it looks thick enough--they can do it by vaginal u/s, that may impact the effectiveness of Clomid. I am no RE, but I have learned so much from other ladies on here I can't help by share my experience.

Also, wanted to let you know that there is another thread through the main page called "ART talk" where women specifically talk about their IUI and IVF as it happens. I post there because I am currently going through IVF right now, you are of course welcome there too.

Good luck--I'd be happy to talk more if you need/want more details!

Holly by Golly


casey - July 19

Hi everyone! I'm also new to all this but I have been reading alot of the posts on this site and have found them very interesting.
I will tell you a little about my situation. I am 26 and DH is 36. We have been TTC for 2 1/2 years (3 years in Oct.) I have 1 daughter who is now 9 from a previous relationship. I have had 2 laparoscopy surgeries. Both indicated partial blockage in 1 tube and severe blockage in the other. 1 was in 2000 and the other this past April. The one in April was done by a fertility dr. and he "reopened" the tube that was partially blocked. I have also taken clomid for about 6 months. All with no success. My husband has been tested and everything is fine with him.
I am going to my fertility dr in a few weeks for an HSG before we begin the IVF process.
I was just hoping for some feedback or advice on what to expect in the coming weeks.
Thanks and good luck to all!


DianaEvans2 - July 21

Welcome Lila! Welcome Casey!

Clomid-ugh. If I recall correctly, Dr. Timonthy Smith (see the Andrology board above) stated that their practice no longer prescribes clomid. If I further recall correctly, only 20% of folks become pregnant with Clomid, not much better than normal statistics, provided there are no other complicating factors. You can post to him and double check the stats-as my memory isn't always 110%-particularily since I am cycling right now with stim meds.

I did Clomid for 3 rounds and stopped, not because I felt physically bad, I was fine...I just got the sense that the clinic I went to was using Clomid as an "easy out" and to make you think you were doing something. I later learned that an acquaintence did 12 months of Clomid with this same clinic. QUICK FRANKLY, that is totally reckless. 12 months can really wear out the lining...I've heard that multiple times that Clomid affects the uterine lining in thinning it out. PLUS this acquaintence was already 40. THIS IS STRICTLY my opinion, but no women over 40 should use Clomid. If you are really serious about family building, try a round of IUI while you get all the other tests done and then go straight to IVF if one IUI (maybe 2 for a comfort level) doesn't work. The statistics about pregnancy rates are published by age brackets on many clinic sites. ALSO the CDC has a very comprehensive pile of statistics. They are very meticuluous. Since I began pregnant at 39 naturally, I didn't really start the fertility dance until 42 (my birthday present then). Now we are on the last stages of IVF. My DH is very reluctant to go beyond a third round with my eggs.....so this is it... I really wish I read all those statistics at 38 and talked to folks then.....but life happens in its own cadence



Mandyc - October 18

Hi everyone,

This is my first message as I've just joined the group!

I'll be doing the IVF on 10/26 and I just need some guidance on the dos and dont. I anyone has any information pls share with me.

Thanks a lot, Mandy



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