Bit the bullet....
30 Replies
Darlene - April 1

Ok, so I bit the bullet, I quit putting it off....and I called this afternoon and made a doctors appt. Wed @ 10.30am. I need to get over my doctor phobia, I want a baby! Im really really scared now.....


Fortyfour - April 6

He has the easy part if you ask me. Sitting in the stirrups with 4 people in the room during the transfer is not my favorite activity. HA. At least he is doing it alone. Good luck and I am so proud of you.


ElizabethS - April 6

Darlene - Good luck today. I think that sometimes waiting is the worst part. We are here for you, and will be throwing tons and tons of baby dust your way.


WantsBaby2 - April 6

How did you appt. go today? Let us know how everything is going! Good luck.



Darlene - April 6

OK, so I feel completely violated!!!!!! For someone who has a phobia of wasnt fun!

We went over my history, missed periods, long, heavy painful periods, yada yada....then he found out Im 23, married and never had a pap smear before. Juts GREAT!!! LOL.

So here I am so embaressed standing butt naked in what they call a "gown"...more like a tank top if you ask me! LOL

He did a Pap smear, then a pelvic exam....everything seems in place PHEW!!! he tried to fell my ovaries but wasnt able to eithout really hurting Im glad, cause even from what he did my ovaries have been aching all afternoon.

I have an ultra sound scheduled for Friday @ 7.30am, the place is right next to my doctors office, so after the ultra sound Im going in so they can draw blood, they are doing a ton of tests. He said seeing I hate doctors he'd just take care of everything at once, so along with testing hormone levels and such heis going to do blood sugar, cholestorol etc...

I was at peace with the Ultra sound at first, picturing the gel, and machine they use on pregnant women...on top of their bellies....yeah then my friend at work shed some light on the situation and said its not that easy...get ready for violation yet again!!!!!! I think maybe I'll take some tylenol beforehand.

Im a little upset after....cause in not so many words the doctor pretty much said if everything comes back normal, then you cant have kids cause your too fat, lose weight..... Ok, he wasnt that rude, but thats what I "heard"... so now Im worrying... for all this time Ive always thought it was PCOS, I fit all the symptoms...but what if everything comes back ok???? Then thats it, your fat, lose weight....come back and see us when your within 10% of your healthy weight....

Ok Im gonna try not thinking about it until everything is back in.

Wish me luck Friday



cassandra - April 7

Oh you poor girl! Never had a papsmear eh? I'm sure you know you should have one once a year, but I won't preach. Sounds like your friend described the U/S to you. Hopefully you have a great nurse for it. It isn't too bad. If it comes back fine (which it probably will) they might do a hystosonogram. That you will need tylenol for but wev'e all had it done and lived to tell about it. It's a test to check your falopian tubes to see if they are blocked. Good luck with your journey! We are here for you! Post anytime......cassandra


meridithhasfaith - April 7

Sorry your visit wasn't as great as we'd hoped. I think that even though you were embarrassed, you will get some good answers from the tests ordered.

As far as the weight goes, don't accept that "you're too fat, go lose weight" answer. That is discrimination and after I read your post, I looked up info on being overweight and conceiving and unless there are underlying issues with being overweight, being heavy in itself is not a basis for infertility and is not a reason to turn someone away. If this RE wont work with you, pick up the phone book and start calling and asking each one if they discriminate based on weight and don't stop until you find one.
Good luck with the tests and I hope you get some help to achieve your dreams.



Fortyfour - April 7

Im glad you went through with your appt. I am so proud of you. It is not fun to be probed like this. Its interesting that your ovaries are so tender. Is anyone elses tender with a check? Mine never were. Is the ultrasound they are doing a vaginal or over the belly? If it is vaginal and your ovaries are tender you may want to take a painkiller. The belly one should not hurt you.

It sound like you should be getting some good answers. I hope it is all good news. On being overweight I always thought that it affected your estrogen/progesteron balance and they can help that out with suppositories. I have a friend who was 100 plus pounds overweight and with progesterone suppositories to balance out the imbalance had 2 kids. The fat in the body produces estrogen along with our ovaries etc.

Good luck and keep in touch with us.


Darlene - April 7

Thanks everyone!!!!!! It could have been worse, and there could potentially be a lot owrse things to come. I just wasnt prepared for this my first visit. I though maybe some blood work but didnt even think about everything else.

Cassandra- Yeah I know you should get yearly pap smears, but that information just blows over my head, my fear of doctors won....not now hahaha, I got it done! UGH I hope they dont do a hystosonogram, Ive heard very painful stories about that!!!!

Meredith- Its not an RE, I just went to see a regular doctor to start. If everything comes back ok and he wont work with me, I will work on finding someone else. I made him out to sound a little harsh, it was exactly as blunt as I put it, but I get the feeling that he has big emphasis on weight, and I wont get anywhere with him unless they confirm I have more serious infertility issues. Im lucky cause with the new insurance I have, I can change doctors as many times as I like. My old one only allowed 3 changes a year.

Forty Four- My ovaries must be very tender, because even this morning, almost a full 24 hours later I still have a dull ache. They really hurt when he tried to fel them during the pelvic exam.

I just hate the whole weight thing. From what he said Im almost hoping they find something, that way I know its not just cause im fat. At least if they find something I can say....Ok....I have PCOS now what am i going to do about it... I can make a plan and get started into this whole baby making thing more indepth.

Thanks guys for all your supprt! I posted on another forum and just got harsh comments about how a pap smear and a pelvic is nothing, and then they proceeded to list all the things they have been through, and that my appt was nothing. I havent been to a docto in like 5 it wasnt nothing to me...this is all new. I know things could get worse....

Anyway I will let everyone know when my results are in.

Thanks, Darlene


Darlene - April 7

Ohhhhhh I just got a good reference for an OBGYN.
I was talking to a friend of mine I met online, we met for dinner with her and her husband the other week, they are such a cute couple! She is pretty heavy and has been TTC 4 years with several miscarriages.
She gave me the name of her OBGYN which is close by, she said she really loves him, and he is not biased against overweight people. I just checked and he is covered by my insurance.
Once I get the outcome of all these tests next week I think I will try move on and meet with him.


meridithhasfaith - April 7

That's excellent, Darlene!
Yes, some things can be caused by extra weight but it isn't always a given that it is and it certainly isn't a reason for a doctor to deny treatment. I am very happy you found a weight friendly doctor. Good luck!

p.s. When will you be getting some results back from these tests?


Darlene - April 7

Im having the u/s and the blood test tomorrow morning.... I have no idea how long it takes???? Maybe they can give me an idea if the u/s shows anything at the appt, but how long does blood work normally take? a week?


Fortyfour - April 8

I am sorry the other site treated you so harshly. I have had patients who have not had paps for 20-30 years because of their fear or discomfort with doctors. You go when you can. I am proud of you for going.

Take care and keep in touch.


cassandra - April 8

That's great Darlene! Good luck with your U/S today. I hope for good results on those tests! That's cool that you actually met someone online that lives close to you. I'm sure she'll be a good buddy for you during this whole process.I actually met someone during our medication class that came in my restaraunt. She introduced herself and now we call eachother a lot. She's overweight but that wasn't the problem, her dh sperm was.Good thoughts for you Darlene. Let us know what happens! cassandra


Darlene - April 8

Ok, well Im back fro m been violated yet again!!! LOL. Ok today really wasnt too bad.

At 6am I started drinking my 32oz of water, and actually finished in 15 minutes...not as hard as I thought it would be to force all the water down.

We arrived 7.15am and I filled out a little paperwork. the nurse/tech whatever she was took me back to the ultra sound room, they started with a regular u/s gel on top of the belly etc...that was a litle uncomfortable just because she was pressing and I had a full bladder! LOL I got to pee after that!!! Thank goodness!!
Then I got into a gown, a REAL gown this time hahaha, I felt much more comfortable with most of my body covered. The vaginal u/s was fine, not really uncomfortable, and the embaressment factor was a lot less due to been covered more. She said the coctor should have the results Monday.

Then we walked next door to the doctors office to have blood done. When I got to the desk she handed me a sample cup....I looked at her quizically...she said they needed a urine sample!!! ARGHHHHHHHHH the doctor never told me that, and I had just well and truley relieved my bladder at the u/s...anyway I managed to pee! hahaha. They drew 4 tubes of blood...and I guess we shall get results back from that early next week?? I dont know.

One thing that worried me a little...... I had posted about how in the pelvic exam my ovaries really hurt, and ached for like 24 hours....well this morning i woke up, happened to look in the mirror before I jumped in the shower...and there is a very dark purple/black bruise just a little bigger than a quarter on my right hand side.... is that normal at all? Am I just super sensitive? Should I worry that a simple pelvic exam caused such bruising????

I'll let you all know when my results come back!!!



snindy - April 8

You will feel violated in the beginning but after a few times, you will get used to it and it will be a piece of cake. Remember to take big breaths, that will help you calm down a little.
I'm overweight also, I know how your feeling but don't let your weight get in your way. Keep focus on what you really want a baby of your dreams.....

Good luck!



meridithhasfaith - April 8

I agree with Cindy. Don't let anything get in the way of your dream.
I think your doctor pressed too hard when feeling for your ovaries which is what caused the pain and bruising. (just my opinion) If women have a little extra "fluff" in the belly, it can make it hard to palpate the ovaries and he really should have gone straight for u/s if he wasn't able to feel them.
Good luck with the blood work and u/s results, let us know!




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