sharedjourney home

I love this site! I have never posted a message before I found this site. I have read a million different messages and cried when I read them because it was so great to know others knew how I felt. My sister-in-law,who is on her 2nd pregnancy in the 3 plus years I have been trying is having morning sickness now. I feel terrible for her because she has a 1 year old, but at the same time I am soooo jealous! I would give ANYTHING to be barfing my guts out due to a pregnancy!!! How sick does that sound! LOL!!!! I will be starting my lupron on Oct. 4th and I cannot wait to start poking myself with needles again. No one but you all can understand my desire to barf and poke myself with needles! Everyone in my family(moms,dads,aunts,uncles,cousins and a lot of people at church)knows about our infertility treatments. We kept it quiet the first few times,but I just thought the more people praying for us the better!!!
I'm really trying not to be jealous but it's very hard.
As for baby showers-I never go. I don't care if people think I'm rude,which no one has ever said,because I just really need to take care of myself at this difficult time. My church is really into pregnancy announcements. My father-in-law is the pastor and last Sunday he announced that my sister-in-law is expecting again,I started to crt right in the church(I also had PMS:()And my grandfather-in-law said while my prego sister-in-law and I were walking into church"blessed is the woman with child" I said "then what about the woman without child???I'm not blessed?" Then he says"OH it will happen for you" I'm telling you if one more person says that to me I am going to SCREAMMMMM!!
thanks for letting me vent! sorry I went on so long!

I totally have to vent. When my cousin called to tell me that she was pregnant with her second baby (which was an accident) she started out by saying that I needed to hurry up and get pregnant because she was. What an idiot. Luckily my sister had called me earlier to inform me and break it to me so I had time to stew over it before my cousin called. Than my friend got pregnant. We have similar stories. We both tried for a while, got pregnant and than miscarried. All this happened to me first and she fallowed after. So it was nice. We could talk to eachother about all the stupid incensative people. Now she has completely turned into one. I don't know if it is because she thinks we have the same story and that makes her exempt from being an idiot. She talks about her pregnancy 24/7. So my husband and I are filing for adoption. So today at work my friend and I were teasing eachother and guess what comes out of her mouth. "At least I dont have to BUY my baby." IDIOT, SELFISH WHORE!!!!! That's what I wanted to say but couldn't. That was steping over boundries. Needless to say, she is no longer numbered among my friends. I have teased about buying my baby, but for her to take a jab like that was so inconsiderate. Sorry I have rambled on but I needed to get that off my chest.

of all of the horible, insensitive things i have ever heard people say to us, that has GOT to be the worst!!
i admire your strength in not strangling her on the spot!
geesh! i don't know how you (or we) put up with stuff like that.
all i can say is, i'm sorry you had to go through that, and hopefully that is the last jerky, mindless thing you'll ever hear.
-pj

I think we're blessed to have found each other in this site. I honestly don't know what I'd do without all of you.

This morning my maid was 20 minutes late. I have to be at the office at 08h00 and she normally comes in at 07h30. When she arrived I was already driving out the gate... She apologised sincerely and told me she's two months pregnant and felt sickish in the morning. Somebody tell me, is it not enough for me to see pregnant people in the malls, office etc. Do I really have to have one in MY house? She's got the right to be pregnant no doubt, but I don't know how to deal with this. I have told her both times I lost my babies am I supposed to be happy for her and forget about my own struggle? Why do I have to watch somebody else have m/s, watch their belly grow etc in my own house. I'm really confused coz I know for sure I can't just send her packing simply becoz she's pregnant and I keep loosing them.

To make matters worse I haven't had AF since my evac on 10th Aug. I really feel like my life is a total mess and all I can do is wait. I'll go see the GYN tomorrow in the meantime I'll keep wondering why this is happening to me. Sorry for the vent

debie
sorry you have to be faced with it at home too. you're right. your home should be able to be a sanctuary from all that stuff out there that makes you feel bad. and the waiting sucks!
i really don't have any advice for you in regads to your maid, but know that you can come here and rant anytime you need it. we're here for each other the best way we know how.
-pj

Boy it seems to come at us from all angles huh? I am sorry Debie about your housekeeper. I hope God gives you the strength to handle this situation.

I even shop at the grocery store early to avoid alot of people. Saturday morning I went early and there was a husband and wife in the only line open. She was really pg and rubbing her belly and smiling at me. If she only knew how cruel she was being since I had just gotten my BFN the afternoon before.

Wantsbaby2

WantaBaby2 I'm sorry about your BFN. Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.