sharedjourney home

I always say "never say never".. so I hate to make such statements.. but I don't think I will try again.. I feel I was VERY lucky with my IF journey.. and hoping the pregnancy goes smoothly.. but the IF journey is so emotionally, physically and financially draining that I will take this one lucky break and run with it and not look back.

So.. to asnwer your question.. I don't think I would ttc a second time.. fertility treatments or not.. DH is going in for a vasectomy soon after (if and when!!) I give birth.. so there ya go!

Now mind you.. I have not thought about what I would do if I don't carry this baby to term... I am just hoping I won't have to cross that bridge....

I hear you about feeling lucky! I find it hard to believe I am pregnant this time and even harder to believe I got prego on my own with my DD 4 yers ago.

DH and I discussed this the other day and we really have always wanted three children. As long as we handle two little ones ok, we do plan to go ahead and try again. Of course, we are trying the natural route for the first 2 years following the birth of this child and then head back to the clinic. Hopefully, something miraculous will happen and I won't have to do IVF again! Wishful thinking, but it could happen!!!!

Justme

Wow. You ask a very pertinent question...DH and I were just talking about this over the weekend.

We want two children. Actually, we wanted more, but given my age and the trouble we had...we've resolved ourselves to two. I'm an only, and I am ADAMANT about more than one - it's less fun the older I get and I don't want to do that to my child.

However, how are we going to GET two children?? I'm not sure we have the financial resources to go through what we went through to get this baby. I had to have several surgeries and I have to see so many doctors that I owe several hospitals all kinds of money since our deductible is so damned high...the worst part is I had two major surgeries exactly one year apart because my endometriosis is SO bad that it takes over and ruins everything...and it gets in the way of the fertility treatments...so between treatments and drugs and surgeries...I'm not sure we have the money to do it all. And, to top it all off, my insurance won't even cover TWO of the prescriptions I have to be on to get pregnant...and that costs me over $300 each month.

Now, adoption might be an option, but I'm not sure where we'll get the money for that either. It's all so hard. We're going to wait until the baby is at least a year before we start talking about what to do next. Hopefully by that time, we'll have a better grasp on our financial situation and will have paid off these damned medical bills. That will give us a better idea of what we have and what we can do.

I go see so many doctors, I have injections twice a day for the MTHFR thing, and I really can't imagine going through all of this with a toddler...so I don't know. Maybe I'll feel differently when the time comes, but my OB and RE both seem to think my situation is getting worse...they said they could try to get me one good pregnancy, but beyond that, they couldn't say...so I know if we go back to IF treatments, it's an uphill battle for us from the start.

It breaks my heart to know that our IF battle is not over...and never will be. We are VERY blessed and I thank God every day for the miracle He has given me. I still cannot believe that we'll have a baby in 9 days!! Rather than worry about baby #2, I'm just concentrating on this baby and leaving the rest to God...it will be however it's meant to be...whether we have another of our own, or bring a baby into our home that needs loving parents, it will happen exactly as it is to happen...I just have to remember that and quit worrying about it right now. But, it's hard.

So there's my answer. I hope this helps...I honestly never in a million years imagined that I would go throught what I went through to get pregnant this time, so who knows about #2. Three years ago I would have told you that you were NUTS if you had said I would jump through all these hoops just to get pregnant, but here I am...so who knows??

Good luck in your decision and I hope you're able to find the answers you're looking for. I hope we all are.


HeatherMac

Heathermac,

Good luck with delivery in 9 DAYS!!!!! Wow, it is finally here! How exciting. Can't wait to hear all about it.

Justme

WOW Heather Baby in 9 Days... That is just awesome, to say the least. Will keep you in my prayers for the safe arrival of your blessing.

Debie

Justme,

There was no question that we would try again, after having our twins. Even when I was p/g w/ triplets, I wanted to try on our own, but would not have done IF treatments. But after the twin p/g, I told DH that I wanted to do it again. We started trying on our own when the twins were 6 months old. We figured we had nothing to lose by trying on our own and were saving $$ to do a FET. We still had frozen embryos. After waiting 3 years to finally have a p/g come to fruition, I wasn't about to give up my dream of having more children.

We tried for a year on our own and then went back to our fertility Dr. to discuss doing a FET again, when I found out that I got p/g on my own despite DH having bad sperm!!!! My fertility Dr. followed me though for the first 8 wks. b/c of previous m/c's and had me take progesterone b/c I didn't really have a corpus luteum cyst secreting progesterone. I am glad that I was followed so closely and am still being followed b/c of having premature babies.

We think this may be it for children, but I am still not ready to close the door on having another child. I guess after struggling for those 3 years, I find it very difficult to give up having another child, as crazy as it may seem. I absolutely love being a Mom more than anything in the world, although I am not going to deny that sometimes it is the most difficult job in the universe, and I find myself at times lacking patience w/ our twins. As an aside I still find myself feeling guilt over these feelings after struggling w/ IF, I feel like I should NEVER lose patience, want time alone, feel frustration like any parent, and I should want to spend every waking hour w/ them b/c I wanted a child/children more than anything in the world. Someone who had undergone IF treatments and finally conceived using donor embryos, told me it was survivor guilt. It seems even after going through IF and having success doesn't ever erase the past. I will never ever forget the desperate feelings of wanting a child and the tremendous sadness of miscarriage. Not matter what happens, I am eternally grateful for our twins and this natural p/g. I feel like I couldn't be more blessed if I tried.

Sorry to go on and on, I tend to be long winded :)

HeatherMac, WOW.. 9 days to go :) Yippee !!!! I will be praying for a wonderful delivery. My C-Section is scheduled for Jan. 5, 2006.

Take Care all and know that all of you are always in my thoughts and prayers.

Meg

Hi Meg! I just realized you are less than a month away from my due date! Time is flying by! I can't believe I'm 34 weeks now! Feeling pretty good. Lately having trouble sleeping and some pressure walking. The maternity belt isn't doing too much for me lately. Just wanted you to know I'm still cookin'! :)

Heathermac, my very best wishes to you on an easy delivery. With a c-sec I hear you won't feel a thing! Have a speedy recovery from that and I can't wait to hear all about your new addition! Hugs!

cassandra

I'm done after this pg. It was very hard getting here, with the meds and the m/c and all. I am now pg with triplets, but one of them is not doing well and OB is sending us to a specialist in NY on Thursday. They are recommending SR as not to risk the other 2 babies. It is heartbreaking to come this far and hear this news, but I have to be grateful for whatever happens. I know there are risks either way.

So, long story short, I will be 39 this month and will be grateful for what I have.

Good luck to all of you as you approach your due dates! It's very exciting!

Sue

Sue,

I will be keeping you and the babies in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that your triplet is okay. Please keep us up to date and just know that we are here for you.
Sending many thoughts and prayers your way,

Meg

Yes Sue please let us know how the triplets are doing... I hope everything is going to be ok....

Sue, I too have you in my thoughts and prayers. I hope to read that all is fine with you and all of your babies. I'm sorry but I don't know what SR means....I hope you still have hope that all 3 babies will be fine. I wish you only the best. Karen

Sue - I am so sorry about the possiblity of having to reduce one of the babies. How awful to go through that. I cant even imagine. Please let us know how the visit goes and if this has to happen for sure. Your are in my prayers

Sue,

You are in my thoughts and my prayers. How awful to have that news. Hope all is well , get lots of rest.

Thanks everyone for your support. You guys have been great from the start.

Our appointment is tomorrow, so I will let everyone know how it goes.

Thanks,

Sue