Anxiety
4 Replies
baby4us - May 2

Yikes... here I am at 35 weeks and extremely anxious. The end seems so close now.. whereas for months and months it was fun getting fat and making excuses to nap during the day and treat myself! But now... I have packed my hospital bag and the nursery is almost complete and I am in the final countdown! Yikes.

The past few nights I have been waking up having an anxiety attack. Just about.. am I ready... will I survive labour.. will I be a good mom... will my baby be a little angel and sleep through the night immediately (HA!!!)

Today I am off to buy some nursing bras!! (How fun) which is one of the few items left on my check list... help... I just want to feel excited and happy about the impending EDD.. but right now it seems like a very scary prospect!!

 

HeatherMac - May 2

Baby4Us,

You're already a GREAT mother!! You've already taken steps to care for a precious baby that isn't even here yet.

It IS scary...there is a lot of unknown to worry about. Will it hurt? Will I make it?? Am I ready?? Well, not to be crass, but you're ready. You were ready the day you got your BFP. Trust me - the second your eyes meet, you will never know the pain and agony you would willingly suffer for that tiny little baby.

So, right now, it is all unknown and and it is all terribly scary. But you'll be fine. Trust me, you'll be fine. LET THEM KNOW YOU ARE AFRAID when you get to the hospital. LET THEM KNOW. The nurse I had held my hand most of the morning during preparations for the c/s. Without her, I'd have been a COMPLETE mess. She was there when DH could not be, and it made ALL the difference in the world. Also - TELL YOUR ANESTHESIOLOGIST!! They have things that won't make you groggy but make sure you don't throw up. They are really great, but you have to communicate with them. If you don't, they won't notice that you're scared or about to puke...so tell them. They are there to help you, and they can also make or break your delivery.

BRIBE YOUR STAFF!! When we arrived for our c/s I had one pie, three coffee cakes, two dozen donuts...and I put it all on the counter and at Labor and Delivery and then introduced myself...then I handed that crap out like CANDY!! Trust me - I got treated like a QUEEN!! I also had coffee cakes for each nurse on each shift for the first day in hospital. I never once waited for drugs. So, before they help you, SHOW THEM YOU APPRECIATE THEM!!

Once baby is here - take the help you're given...ask for help when you need it. It's hard, yes, but if you don't, you'll end up in an uneasy place.

As you've read from Cassandra and me...our posts on Being a Mother...it is a whole new world. Sometimes it's very hard because the image we have in our head and the reality is vastly different. I think I read somewhere that every mother dreams of a wonderful, happy baby...but the baby we all dream of is a 3 month old. The beginning is very hard, it's an adjustment for you, for baby, for DH...and it's difficult because one of you can't communicate what they want. There will be nights where you cry just as much as baby cries, and you're just as frustrated as baby. There will be long nights, there will be nights that are far scarier than the anxieties you're feeling now because you have no idea what to do...but you'll survive. You'll make it. You'll be great. Because you made a commitment long ago to that baby - and to yourself - to do everything necessary to make life good for both of you. So, while it may get very, very hard, you'll make it and you'll amaze yourself. Just remember to ask for help when you can - it's hard because you're knee deep in poop with a screaming baby who's cried all night and you have no idea what to do...it's hard to pick up the phone and ask for help. But, please, when you have a second, call someone and ask for help...so you can take a nap, take a shower, take a walk...just get a second to pull yourself together and refresh yourself.

The thing is - the second your eyes meet that precious baby you've dreamed about...and your first thought is: "How do I thank God for a blessing such as this?"...your anxiety will change, there will be new things to worry about, but none of it matters. Feed that baby, hold that baby, love that baby, look at that baby, wonder at that baby...and don't worry. Like I said, you're already a great mother.

So, rub your belly, nap often and relish the last bit of pregnancy...it goes by so quickly. Soon, you'll have a sweet little baby to rub, nap with and relish.


HeatherMac

 

fiso - May 2

Wow, Heather Mac, that was great!!!! You put all our anxieties into perspective. I'm only 17 wks along, but the more I read, the more I think, will I remember that, what if..., what if... and I don't know what to do? The anxiety level is not as high as for baby4us because I still have time, but your words helped me.
Thank you for taking the time to still hang out with us, here on this website! You must have your hands full with your son.

BAby4us, get some sleep!!! You won't be able to do that in a few weeks!!Look, you must have read everyhting in the creation about babies, you have taken all the classes you needed to take, the rest will come by itself. And you will always have a good friend, oir relative who can give you info or help you when you need it.
Take a deep breath and enjoy the last few weeks.
Have fun shopping...bra shopping has never been my favorite, but nursing bra shopping, that will be a twist for me!
Talk to you soon.
Fiso

 

justme - May 2

I hear you!!!!! It will all be ok!!!!

Justme

 

baby4us - May 3

Thank you THANK YOU Heathermac, Fiso and Just Me!

I wish I could give you all a hug.. I feel so close to you ladies... such a weird relationship this "chat room" thing... as I feel so close to all of you.. yet we really don't know much abotu each other.. other than fertility treatments, baby news, fears, etc.

I think I joined this site a little over a year ago... and it has been such a constant source of encouragement and support. I don't think I could have done it all without this site and without you ladies... so thank you all.

I really feel that unless you can speak with others who have been through similar experiences... you cannot truly appreciate all we have been through. And I appreciate each and every one of your posts!

Good luck Just me... I am so cheering you on..
And Heathermac... you have been so great with all your infinite knowledge, etc.. and for Fiso... right behind us and still imparting wisdom..

 

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