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* DING *
Round two, coming up.
I'm as nervous as a whore in church. My OB has suggested we contact our RE for a consultation in February to get the ball rolling on #2, and I am as nervous as can be.
I'm older, I know the hellish journey infertility takes a girl on, it took five years with #1 and we don't have that kind of time for #2, we have a nephew just born with some pretty nasty chromosomal issues. Do we even press for genetic testing? I still have 20 pounds I'd like to lose. I haven't been on my meds (metformin, folic acid, etc) for nearly six months because of the cost so will that affect my baby's health...all kinds of nifty fears causing me to bite my fingernails again.
Any help for a girl just getting ready to plunge back into the icy waters??
I feel really selfish asking for a second miracle, I really do. But being an only child, I can't do that to my son. I always pictured us with four kids, but my prayer now is just two. Actually, my prayer to God was just one happy, healthy baby. Now I feel like a heel going back on that and asking for ANOTHER one. I do feel selfish. But, something in me presses. The pregnancy was hard for me physically and my parents are concerned that a pregnancy might not be too good for me. I got the all clear from my OB, who KNOWS my history, but I have a weird feeling that something isn't right. Is it fear from what I DO know? What is going on in here?? (My head, that is.)
Thanks for any advice, input, suggestions, wisdom, experience. All is welcome here.
THANKS!!
HeatherMak
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Heathermak,
I don't think you should feel selfish at all asking for a second miracle. You are a wonderful women with a great heart. You have helped so many of us get by each day, and you are a wonderful mother. The girls that should feel guilty or selfish are the mothers that kill,or abandon there babies. It drives me crazy that god grants wishes to the wrong people and women like us have to feel like this to have a healthy baby!! I don't know what I would do in your situation, but I think the good thing is that your OB gave you the okay. I also think the fear is just because you know what this long road is like and what could happen during it. You have to follow your heart and if it says try again, then go for it. I will be praying for you every step of the way!!!
Ginamarie
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Gina,
YOU ROCK. Thank you so much for your kind words. Thank you so much. Someone told me that if I were not plagued by infertility, I wouldn't even be thinking about this because it wouldn't be an issue. People with no infertility issues rarely ever have to think this when they want another child...there's no guilt, no concern about what kinds of treatment and proceducres, how many shots and pills...so I guess we're a special lot.
Thank you so much, again, for your kind words. That really touched my heart and I truly appreciate it.
I will keep you in my prayers and hope you'll keep me updated.
HeatherMak
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