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It's almost 4am and I cannot sleep. Had a horrible day yesterday. Hubby found out he was not lasek eye surgery candidate. He was devastated, but hung in there. I had my HSG that day too. And it turned out positive on both sides. I'm devastated. Hubby has been supportive and I have to be strong too, so as not to dishearten him. but i'm a sick mess.
Been thinking about my life, and the moment it may have happened. I had limited resources, didn't even know about planned parenthood till a year or so after possible infection. what i retard i was. I did not, love myself then, took things for granted.
and now, the only thing my man wants, I can't give to him. He has to suffer for my bad choices. I feel like total shit but i will get thru this! i know it.
I have a great husband, who is standing by me. He told me when i first told him about it he knew this might be a possibility,infertility, but he accepted me and proposed to me anyway. Of course, i told him to find someone else to marry and bear children with yesterday, when the HSG came up positive. What a loser I am. He didn't find that too funny! ;)
So it's good to know i have options, that i have support. that i'm not alone. I never saw my life like this, but ya know what? LIFE DOES throw you curve balls! and you have to DEAL with it!
I have work tomorrow so i better go to sleep. Also, have to stop causing hubby stress.
Thank you for this board! I feel so much better just venting!
Anyone done surgery after blocked tubes on both sides? Share experience please.
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