Failed Donor Egg Cycle
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punchunuk - July 10

I am 43 and husband is 47. We decided to do a DE cycle after long meditations and soul searching. We found a good RE and found a donor age 21 all testing came back fine. Then came stimulation and egg and things began slowly. She took longer than I thought to stim (12 days) with menopur and a total of 14 eggs collected. My husband's sample was 'fine' on the ay and the clinic did not do ICSI (not sure why as our history file states it was performed each time prior as I had 4 ivf cycles fail using my own eggs). Consequently only one fertilzed naturally. Next day nurse said we had only 9 eggs to fertilize with ICSI. They did ICSI day after retrieval and only 3 additional ones fertilized for a total of 4. As you can imagine my anxiety levels were high and I was very angry with the clinic for their misjudment. When I questioned my RE he was defensive and I said that this was an unbelievable result with a Donor age 21. He said, ''That is why I prefer our clinic's donors ". How could he say that? It was my fault for not choosing his donors? Especially when they only had 5 to pick from?? I also resented the insinuation that it was my fault????

We had a day 3 transfer - unfortunate as I wanted 5 days but clinic said there would not be any left if we waited. They transferred 2 and one to freeze. Unfortunately, the little one did not make it to freeze and I got a big fat negative yesterday. No pregnancy!!! After all of this time, effort and expense! This was not supposed to happen - it defies logic that there are no embryos left!!!

So, here I am now trying to make sense of it all. I don't understand. we have so many questions and few answers. Would performing icsi straight away have made a difference? How could my husband's sample look good at first then not? Was there something wrong with the eggs? Is there something wrong with me? I have had a hysteralpingogram and have a mild arcuate uterus but no other issues.

Can you suggest next steps? I would like to try again but am afraid of another failure. I am mourning my own eggs and now my donor's and our lost embryos.

If I may ask, do you think we should have my husband's sample tested? I have had immune testing and showed a slightly elevated NK cells for which I was given predisolone.

We did have 1 embryo that did fertilize naturally and was 8 cells at transfer so I am wondering if it could be other factors? I have been told that I am fine other than an mild arcuate uterus.

I guess my question is could it have been something in me or my husband that could have contributed to such a poor result and if so what could we do to correct if we decide to do this again.

thank you in advance for your time and consideration .Please help.

 

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