sharedjourney home

Babybop,

I know exactly how you feel! Some days it is overwhelming. I love my husband and he is a good man and a good husband but I end up doing more then my share of the work in almost everything. It not only terrifies me that I will have most of the responsibility of the baby, plus everything I do now – the house, bills, money, insurance, taxes, etc. but I am now scared how he will ever manage with the baby if something ever happened to me.

I have told him over and over that even though I used to do almost everything, even though I shouldn’t have had to, that I just can’t do it anymore. My husband really thinks he is “helping” but he really doesn’t have a clue what it takes to run a family or a household. He rarely takes the initiative to do things and if he does, it will probably be a half-ass attempt. Then he expects lots of praise and thanks because he “helped”. Or he gets angry if I ask him to do something and tell him I need it done by a certain day or time. He says I am “using up his time” and making all these plans for him that he just doesn’t have a say in. So I either save a lot of it up for one big fight or just do it my self. If I try to get someone else to help me, it hurts his pride.

I wish I had some good advice. I usually try to remember that in his mind, he means well and really thinks he is helping. I remind myself that it could be much worse. I also dream a lot about the day I have enough money to just hire someone behind his back to help me with all the things he won’t or doesn’t. I knew when we decided to have a family that the responsibility would be more mine. I knew he would be there for the fun stuff or if something really bad happened but I knew almost everything else would fall to me.

I know it doesn’t help much but it makes me feel better knowing that I am not alone. I thought I was just expecting too much.

Charity

On a brighter note -

We finally have a 100% girl verdict! During our appointment, they took pity on us and let us schedule an ultrasound for later in the afternoon. Well, it ended up taking 2 ultrasound appointments with 2 different technicians and machines but we finally got a 100%!!!

Hi Ladies ~
I usually post on the Ovulex board, but I have a questions for those of you ladies that have received your BFP (congratulations BTW :)
I have both ovaries and only one fallopian tube. My other fallopian tube works well, as I had a HSG last spring to confirm. I am taking ovulex, geritol tonic, prenatals, green tea, and mucinex to help my chance of conceiving.

Have any of you conceived with only one fallopian tube (or a similar situation)? If so, how long did it take you?

Also, I had ovulatory pain yesterday. I felt it in the middle of my pelvic area, but it radiated to the right side. I am nervous that I am going to O from the right side (the side without a tube). Have any of you heard of Oing on one side and the other tube picking up the egg for fertilization? My MD said that sometimes happens??

Thank you for taking the time to read this! Again, congratulations to all of you who have gotten that BFP! You are an inspiration to those of us still on the journey to BFP!!!!!

Love ~ Butterfly

babybop and Charity,

I sure know how you ladies are feeling especially right now that everything is so sensitive to you while pregnant. Well before I had my son I though that my dh was going to be a great daddy always playing with my son. because thats what he did with his nephew, he would always buy him everything and take him with us almost every weekend when we would go out on dates. Well it happen some times not all of the time but he loved his nephew more than me..;(
Well when we had our son he was a good dad and took care of him only when our son was sleeping but now that he is 2 years old he doesn't play much with him and he gets mad for anything that my son deos wrong. You know that a 2 year old boy doesn't know from right to wrong at this moment but they are learning if we talk to them and let then know what they did wrong, not by screaming at him and getting all mad right?
Well that is one of the issues that I have because since we both work we only see him after 5p.m. and on. My son likes being with his dad all the time but dh doesn't play much with him.
I am so thankful that we live with my parents and my mom and dad are like his parents more than we are because they are laways playing with him.
That makes it so hard with me because I try to be all the time with my son and tried all my best for dh to play more attention to him but it is hard.
I am totally in your side because us women do more than the dh does and they don't even accept it, just because he pays the rent he says that he pays more than I do and that makes him a macho man!
We need to do something about it because this is getting out of hand. We seem to be mom and dad with our lil ones and that is just not fair. Dh need to helps us because it's their obligation.

Sorry for taking so long but I sure know how you feel, Babybop especially you that you are not close to your parents I know how much they are needed and if they weren't because of them I don't kow where I would be standing right now..lol Our parents are such a big help!

hang in there girls you will eventually find a way to figure this whole thing out.

I have talks with dh and let him know that he nneds to pay more attention to his son because his son needs from him and he is getting the idea but it's just taking long.

have faith that everything will be ok!

Love Lili

Hi Butterfly,

I wasn't in that situation and don't know anyone that was - but if I hear of anything, I will be sure to pass it on. My issue was that I had a fibroid tumor in my uterus and my uterus and cervix were in the totally wrong position. I had surgery to correct both and they blew my tubes out while I was in surgery - just in case. After that, we weren't sure I was ovulating consistently or if my husband's swimmers were good.

I tried Ovulex for 2 months and had just given up on it and was about to start Clomid and my husband was about to be tested. The exact week I was supposed to start Clomid is when I found out I was pregnant from Ovulex. The doctor was waiting for my period to start, so that they could time the Clomid right. I was 3 days late but didn't feel pregnant. I took the pregnancy test on a Sunday just because I knew that was the first thing the doctoc was going to ask me Monday morning. Well, I was SHOCKED when it was positive. So I took another and here I am 26 weeks later.

Good luck!

Charity ~ Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. I am so happy for you and your dh! It must have felt so wonderful to finally get that BFP :) It is so encouraging to hear ovulex success stories ~ it gives me hope!

I am not going to give up on Ovulex b/c I truly feel like it is helping me. If I don't get the bfp this month I will know it was prob. b/c I o'd on my right side. Hopefully, next month I will then O on my left side! It's frusterating b/c I do not have a hormonal problem, my cycles are regular, and I O every month! Sometimes I wonder if it will ever happen for me....

TTC can sure be complicated but I will tell you that since I started charting and reading more about it, I've learned SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much about fertility and my body.

Thank you again for sharing your story. It really helped :)

Love ~Butterfly

Hi Ladies,

Sorry it has been so long, life has been crazy.

Well, on Tuesday January 16th, Justin made his way into the world at 8 pounds 9 oz measuring 20.25 in. I ended up having a c-section which was much better than the horror stories I had heard. It was a wonderful event. The doctors made it so special. They even had eighties music playing in the background so Mr. Justin was born to Todo's Out of Africa. It was so enjoyable (well as enjoyable as being in surgery can be).

Justin is very healthy and a terrific baby. I have gotten very lucky.

The midwife and I are considering starting a support group for woman in our town whose husbands leave them while they are pregnant. I have been amazed at the number of woman I have talked to who have been through the same thing. What is up with these men...sorry, boys?

My divorce was finalized on the day of Justin's birth which I found ironic. He has visited Justin once in the last two weeks. I am happy about that. I am hoping he pretty much leaves us alone. Enough that Justin knows he exists but does not know him as a person.

I was trying to post photos and I have them on photo bucket but I have forgotten which entry to paste. If someone can tell me I will post some photos.

I hope everyone else is doing well. I have missed chatting with you all. I feel like I would have never gotten through this pregnancy well without all the support. This site is such a blessing.

Take Care,
Heather

Charity: Congratulations!!! Now you, Mahogany Heart, and I are all having girls!!! There's just something different about preparing for a little girl, somehow it's more fun to me.
Both Charity and Lilli, Thank you so much for the info on your husbands. Now I know mine isn't an alien!! I think it's funny how God made women the sex that bares children with all that we're capable of....men would never be able to be a wife, mother, head of household, and career woman...and they say we're the weaker sex?!?!? Its so frustrating and scary all at the same time. As we speak, he is in Miami at the Superbowl and has been there for almost a week. Since then, the pipes burst in my garage....of course I had to handle that! He knows how to handle everything right when it comes to his money, his friends, and his social life......but when it comes to small requests from his wife, like actually loading the dishwasher AND cleaning the sink/garbage disposal...he can only manage one of the two, and hardly without making a mistake. But I guess it really could be worse....he could be the lazy slob on the couch that won't do anything but watch football all day.....OR the Al Bundy type....I guess I should thank God for small favors.

Heather: YAAAAAY!!!!!! I am so glad to hear from you. I am also very happy that things went well during your birth and Justin (of course) is perfect. I think a support group would be a fabulous idea. I suddenly got an image of the movie, "The First Wives Club" with Goldie Hawne, Bette Midler, and Diane Keaton.......great movie. I love the ending when they all sing, "You don't own me".....wonderful display of girl power. Anyway, I am in awe of your strength! Take a bow....whether it feels like it or not, you've won!

Heather – CONGRATULATIONS. You are an inspiration! Things are only going to get better from here! I can’t wait to see pictures!

Heather,
Congratulations!! I am so happy that everything went well. I was wondering about you girl. But I am happy that you finally kept in touch with us. God bless you and your lil one.

Let us know how it goes. You are very lucky and I am so proud of you!!

Love Lili

How is everyone feeling? Nothing new here. Some cramping and a tight abdomen, but from what I am reading, it could just be that the baby is moving out of her transverse position.

Anyway - just wanted to check on everyone.

Charity

Hello Ladies,
It's been quite some time since I've posted to this site and the first time that I've ever posted to the BFP success stories...I finally got my BFP this morning!!! I'm soooooo excited! After 15 months of TTC it finally happened! I'm still shaking.....
Steph:)

[URL=http://www.slide.
com/item_finder?referrer=hlnk&pciid=kcV_
rZKYPNTvB0M1utgifpWVk1BchB0tbECUFjZuMkTBxD42
EPcDyOZLHo7zAb6q&dir=0][IMG]http://widge
t.slide.com/rdr/1/1/3/W/500000003f42f5a/1/0/
_B5kxyFeUaxakD9jFBAr3uA87uiidgUm.jpg[/IMG][/
URL]

Oh Stepanie - CONGRATULATIONS! How are you feeling? What finally worked for you? I remember I didn't believe my BFP - after trying so long, it seems like a mistake!!! I don't think I really believed I was pregnant until I saw the first ultrasound.

CONGRATULATIONS STEPH!!!!!

What a wonderful blessing.

Best of luck to you and a happy, healthy pregnancy!

Thanks, Charity!!! I remember reading your posts back when I started posting in May...I stopped for a while though because I was have some irregular cycles and having a hard time with all the TTC stuff. I still can't believe it! The only thing I have is sore (.)(.)'s, I had some light cramping like AF was coming but that seemed to stop over the weekend, and I also get heartburn with certain foods (like I drank orange juice with breakfast and am regretting it now). If I calculated correctly I'm almost 5 weeks...so only 35 more to go!

Hi Ladies ~ i am so glad to hear all the good news on this board!! It is very uplifting!!!

Question: For those of you who took Ovulex and received your BFP: When did you stop taking it? Before your BFP or after you BFP?

The reason I ask is because this is my first cycle on Ovulex and I am now 11 dpo. I've been having low back pain, O type pain, thick white creamy cm (starting 6dpo), and I feel tired alot. So, in case these are BFP symptoms, I am wondering if I should stop the Ovulex? Af is due on Wednesday.

Thanks for your help!

Congrats to all the new mommies and the mommies-to-be!!!!

Love ~ Butterfly