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amyb - November 13th, 2007 9:22 PM

we are hosting Thanksgiving of around 30 and normally I usually love to partake in the array of wines that we have. That won't be happening this year - I'm not ready to tell my family at all, (it's too soon and we have had bad u/s and I'm nit sure if the baby is going to make it.) But as soon as they see I'm not drinking the questions will be going to fly.

Any suggestions?? ???

lprimm10 - November 20th, 2007 4:36 PM

If worse comes to worse just pretend to drink. I know that sounds silly, but take a little sip and spit it out at the same time. Noone will know trust me. Also I hope everything goes well with the baby.

jiffys76 - November 20th, 2007 5:52 PM

I know what you mean about Thanksgiving.... My inlaws know that it is not looking like we are not going to be able to conceive and will be soon looking at adoption after Christmas. But I am not looking forward to telling the rest of my husbands family and getting all of those pitty looks. He has a cousin that is pg for the second time. It is really going to suck seeing her pg. Any advice???


Jeep-n Jenny

jeni_turner - November 21st, 2007 9:42 AM

Jenny- It can be very hard to be around people who are pg, especially for the 2nd time...It seems so unfair that some people don't even have to try while others go through so much!
A friend of mine called to tell me she is pg for the 3rd time and actually told me that she didn't know "what they were going to do about it" (i.e. abort). She knows that we have been trying for a while. I felt sick and was upset for days over it. I finally let it go and realized it was her issue not mine.
My advice? I just try to ask how she's feeling and focus on her challenges, like being tired and pg while working with 2 kids. It helps me feel some sympathy for her and not go crazy!
Sounds weird, but that's what has worked for me...Just find something to feel bad about for them and something to be grateful for that you have....I know it's hard.
**We are also considering adoption. I just wonder how long of a process that is!

jiffys76 - November 21st, 2007 10:15 AM

Jellybean,

Thanks for the advice. I'll try to suck it up tomarrow. We have not started the whole adoption thing just yet - after Christmas? I know people that have gone through public and private. From what I can tell from my local CSB web site public can take up to 12 months and is only around $400. Private is a shorter wait but in more expensive. Do you want a baby or will you take an older child? What about race??? My husband and have talked a little about this. We would be willing to take a child that is under 5 years, sibblings are OK, multiples are OK, any race, blind or deaf is OK. I work with kids that have profound special needs - So I don't think I could work with that all day and come home and deal with it. So, no involved special needs.

We have not gotten the final diagnosis of infertal. I am waiting for a AMH test to come back on Dec. 3rd. We are just starting to try to prepair our selves for the worst.

Jeep-n Jenny

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