Adoptive parents tell it like it is
"Some people seem to need to rank-order these ways of having children -- to judge that one way is better than another. I've never really felt the need to do that. I just know that I simply ca't imagine my life without our three children, and I am so very grateful every day that we had the incredible good fortune to be able to adopt them. If we had grown three children, they wouldn't be THESE three children, and that's just not something I can even begin to think about, much less accept." Margie H.
Several concerns related to love are specific to parents who already have children by birth. They may wonder how they will feel about their child who joins the family by adoption.
"Upon considering adoption, I did wonder how I would feel about a child not born to me. Well I guess I consider her born to me anyway, anyhow. I didn't know if it was possible to feel the way that I do now but it is. She is my kid in every way possible. I know I have to tackle the issues that will arise later when she asks questions, but I will do my best."
"I think someone who has had no bio kids will read this and say, "Well she's had it both ways, what does she know about the pain of not having bio kids?" Yes... this is true but what I am saying that adopting kids can be just as glorious as having bios. There I've said it! It's different but just as glorious!" Kathie G.
Mixing birth and adoptive children
One of the most significant concerns for these families may be the impact of bringing an adoptive child into an established family. While this is something that parents need to address seriously, the expansion of the family can have many benefits for everyone.
"Paige was definitely meant to be a part of our family and is our daughter and sister of our children, Tyler and Dalton. I also never expected to see the bond between them with Paige. They adore her. It is so awesome to see Dalton be a "big" brother to his sister. They have the usual issues that all siblings - no matter what the age - go through and I expect to experience them at each stage of their growth - but the love they share is so wonderful to witness. So anyone who might question the idea of mixing birth and adopted children - that too is not an issue. It works wonderfully." Sue A.